


the menace of the years finds and shall find me unafraid

by PrincessAmonRae



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, and a bit of smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:07:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25270612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrincessAmonRae/pseuds/PrincessAmonRae
Summary: “What were you thinking about?” Nicky asks as his hand drifts to cover the one of Joe’s resting on his hip and squeezing reassuringly.“Quynh.” Her name comes out roughly and Nicky squeezes his hand again. Nile’s dreams had reopened wounds that had never properly healed, probably never would. “And how Andy is stronger than any of us.”“We all looked for Quynh. We did our best.”“I would not have had the strength to stop searching,” Joe scrapes out. “To stop throwing myself into the deepest depths of the ocean to either find or join you.”
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 38
Kudos: 674





	the menace of the years finds and shall find me unafraid

“You are thinking too loud,” Nicky says sleepily, though he doesn’t move from where he is tucked against Joe. 

“Apologies,” Joe says and kisses the nape of Nicky’s neck before he presses more kisses there, one for every time Nicky died since they found Nile. The number is always too high, the panic that strangles him never lessens, even after a millennium. 

“What were you thinking about?” Nicky asks as his hand drifts to cover the one of Joe’s resting on his hip and squeezing reassuringly. 

“Quynh.” Her name comes out roughly and Nicky squeezes his hand again. Nile’s dreams had reopened wounds that had never properly healed, probably never would. “And how Andy is stronger than any of us.” 

“We all looked for Quynh. We did our best.” 

“I would not have had the strength to stop searching,” Joe scrapes out. “To stop throwing myself into the deepest depths of the ocean to either find or join you.” 

“You would have,” Nicky says, gently, reassuringly as he slowly turns himself in Joe’s arms to face his love. Joe layers kisses across his brow, his eyelids with a rough chuckle. 

“Perhaps I could have been convinced. And I imagine that I would have applied the rest of my existence to science.” Joe chuckles again at Nicky’s confused look. “Is our final time a matter of time, or a number?” 

Nicky sits bolt upright in shock as the implication sets in. “No.” 

“Nicolo-“ 

“No Yusuf,” Nicky bites out as he trembles at the very idea of it. Joe sits up and pulls him against his chest. “No.” 

“Nicky you are my _everything_. You are my lifeblood, my gravity, my air. I do not remember how it felt to live without it and I know that I could not learn to again.” Joe spreads his hand over the reassuring beating of Nicky’s heart. Nicky reaches up and clutches onto that hand with as much force as he can muster. 

“Do you think I would not know, would not feel it? That my destiny had given up, had left me to a world without him?” Nicky grates out between his teeth. “How would I have borne it Joe?” 

They fall silent in each other’s clutches before Joe’s other arm wraps around Nicky as well and he speaks again. 

“Andy is stronger than any of us,” Joe repeats as he buries his face in the curve of Nicky’s neck. “And I thank whatever gods may be for the fact that it wasn’t you.” 

“I do believe the line is supposed to end with ‘my unconquerable soul’,” Nicky teases to lighten the mood, and because Joe had quoted it to him many times since it had been published. Joe laughs lightly. 

“It’s the same thing. You are my unconquerable soul,” he says. Nicky turns in Joe’s grasp to face him, with his knees bracketing Joe’s thighs, brining his hands up to cup Joe’s face. Nicky spares a few seconds to sweep his thumbs along Joe’s cheekbones, the underside of his eyes, spares a few seconds to breathe in his lover before ducking to kiss him deeply. 

“Promise me,” Nicky begs when he eases his lips away from Joe’s. “Promise me that you will not chase your time.” Joe studies him intensely before a smile quirks his lips. 

“And you accuse me of being an uncurable romantic,” Joe says which drags a rough laugh out of Nicky before he falls serious again. “I promise you Nicolo di Genova, that I will not chase my time. Not now, not ever.” 

“Thank you,” Nicky breathes as the tension leaks out of his shoulders in the same way it does when they make eye contact after every death. Nicky kisses Joe again and exhales his thanks over and over against Joe’s lips before Joe pulls away and leans back until he is propped up on his elbows and reaches with one hand to card his fingers through Nicky’s hair. 

“I love you, I would do anything for you. Even somehow try to live in a world without you,” Joe swears with love shining in his eyes. Nicky smiles. 

“Then may I ask a favour?” 

“A favour?” 

“Make love to me,” Nicky requests as if there is any instance where Joe would say no. 

“That is not a favour my love. That would be my most greatest pleasure.” Joe lies down on his back properly and smooths his palms up Nicky’s sides taking his shirt with them and as always, his eyes feast on the skin that is revealed. “Beautiful, my Nicky, you are so beautiful.” 

“You too,” Nicky says as he grasps Joe’s shirt and pulls it over his head, wishing he had his lover’s gift for words. And then Nicky swallows. “Tell me.” 

“Like this?” Joe asks as he skates his palms up and down Nicky’s sides and he nods, leaning over Joe in a way that rocks their growing erections together. Joe moves his hand to the curve of Nicky’s shoulders, tracing the pattern of the freckles that he memorized eras ago. “This is where your sun kissed skin demonstrates that you are my sun.” 

“This,” Joe says as his hand moves to where Nicky’s breaths and moans expand his rib cage. “is where your breath becomes mine.” 

“Joe,” Nicky chokes out on a moan as Joe slicks his fingers on his other hand and slides them gently into Nicky. 

“This,” he whispers. “is where you let me worship you as the deity you are.” He and Nicky find an easy rhythm together as Nicky rocks himself on Joe’s fingers until panting he nods at him and Joe removes his fingers. Nicky lovingly smooths lubricant over Joe before he seats himself on him while they moan in tandem, and the pleasure sparking behind Joe’s eyelids is almost enough to make him forget his words. 

“But this,” he moves both hands over Nicky’s heart. ”This is where Nicolo di Genova protects the heart of Yusef Al-Kaysani. You are my heart Nicky, my soul and I love you. I have been honoured to love you for a millennium and I pray that we have many many more ahead of us.” 

Then they are both moving together, Joe thrusts up as Nicky lowers himself down and they both moan in tandem again. Nicky presses his palms against Joe’s chest for leverage and looks him in the eyes. 

“I love you,” Nicky says before his words are cut off with a cry of pleasure as Joe wraps a hand around him. “Yes, Joe please.” 

“Together,” Joe says and if their lovemaking is a little more hurried than usual, especially considering they haven’t died all that recently, neither of them seem to be complaining as Nicky’s spine arches as he thrusts into Joe’s fist and clenches around his cock, crying out as he comes across Joe’s stomach at the same moment Joe thrusts up quickly, once twice before spilling inside Nicky. 

“I love you doesn’t seem like enough. And yet it is everything,” Nicky says once he gets his breath back, and is tucked back into the safety of Joe’s arms. Joe huffs out a laugh. 

“I’ll make a poet out of you yet.” 

“Perhaps in another millennium.”

**Author's Note:**

> Title and poem Nicky references are from Invictus by William Ernest Henley. (I cannot believe I did the Thing TM of doing an all lowercase title from a poem.)  
> Anyways this movie is amazing and I loved it and I love these two and like why not just toss in a small smattering of angst?


End file.
